Everything's Wrong, but That's Alright

Oh boy, I'm uberfuckingpissed.

I've spent essentially the last two days researching the Emerging Church movement (see: Rob Bell, the Mosaic Church, http://theparish.typepad.com ) and have come across this website/blog that is hotly opposed to it: http://www.sliceofloadicea.com composed mainly of members of the historic orthodox movement (see: 5-point Calvinists, Christian fundamentalists, Ingrid Schlueter, the radio show Crosstalk). There is much criticism on this website with which I agree, namely of Rick Warren, the The Purpose-Driven Life, and the Mega-church movement (see New Life Christian Fellowship, Saddleback Church, BattleCry). There is, however, a lot of things that they criticize from a rather closed-minded perspective, which (as anyone who knows me and my journey can attest to) really sets me off. They approach those with whom they disagree with noses turned up and often times employ sarcasm over logic as a device of argument. The moderators (the ones who post the main topics of all threads) seem to base much of what they say on the fundamental principle that what they believe is right, absolutely. Occasionally you’ll see some scripture references, but the correctness of their contextualization vacillates greatly.

I have commented on a few things, and in one entry a pastor responded by brushing me off since I had “obviously drunk way too deeply at the well of so-called ‘postmodernism.’” I love how you mention someone like Soren Keirkegaard and people automatically assume that you’re a deconstructionist. He also threw some scripture at me in response to me saying that “I fear that the traditional approach to Christianity too often focuses on what one should not do, rather than taking the path of righteousness and actively seeking to do what is right. It would follow that a consistent pursuit of the right thing would eventually lead to a natural straying from the wrong,” an assessment I have already qualified in other entries. He gave me Romans 3:10-12 to read, which I did, but am somewhat confused as to how it applies to what I was saying. I do know, however, that that same chapter of Romans goes on to validate the point that I had just made, so of course, I used it in my rebuttal when I quoted verse 20 of the same chapter, in which Paul says that just adhering to the law is not enough to live a life that is reflective of God. I don’t know what type of pastor this guy is, but he did a pretty shitty job of convincing me that he was right, both because of his unclear use of the bible and the extremely bad mistake of attempting to categorize me and thus assume that he knew more about my argument than I did. Sorry asswipe, don’t try to pull that shit on me. I usually am not going to enter an argument that I’m not prepared to substantiate. I responded to his rebuttal of my commentary, but magically, I haven’t heard anything back from him (and I was much nicer than I am being on here).

Anyway, other than that, my interaction with the website has been pretty surface. I’ve read and considered a lot of what they’ve said, again varying from agreement to disagreement, but not really finding anything that lit my passions. Until about 2 hours ago. Which is when I became uberfuckingpissed.

I’m going to try to link as much of this as I can, but I’m going to be quoting a lot…sorry, but its necessary for me to make my point! I wander upon this article:

"The University of California doesn't care if Christian schools teach the creationist vivew of science. No, no. They think that's part of your first amendment right, to study that God made the world, that humans aren't evolved from slime by chanace, but rather were designed by a Creator. Just don't expect to get credit for the science courses you study if they are from text book makers like Abeka and Bob Jones Unviersity. This is how the persecution begins. Now if your children go to Christian schools and take science classes rooted in the design of Creator God, they could possibly be rejected for college, or be forced to take an evolutionist version of the subject to get credits that qualify. The perseuction and marginalization of true Christians has begun in our country. But when nearly 90 perecent of evangelical young people are educated in public schools with an atheistic worldview, this shouldn't affect the vast majority of evangelical Christians. Those who obey the Scripture's injunctions to teach our children, line up online, and educate them according to God's Word, those are the ones who will pay the price. Here's the story."

Okay…I remember Abeka and Bob Jones text books from my days as a homeschooler, and honestly, I can totally understand why the California State Board of Education doesn’t consider them “college-prep” level. They’re shit. I mean, really terrible stuff. They are terribly biased, and not particularly scientific in their approach to argument.

The truth is about this move by the BoE is that it isn’t even directed at Christians in particular anyway. It is a method of creating a standard required for entry into college…that way, UC’s across the state are guaranteed a certain level of preparedness from anyone applying to their colleges. Yeah, so the state has control over what is in those text books, but you know what I say? 2 Timothy 2:15: Study to show thyself approved. Why are you limited to the information in those textbooks…shouldn’t you be in voracious pursuit of the truth anyway, and seeking as many sources with which to compare so that you can come to a logical, personal decision on what is the truth of the matter? Go get another textbook that teaches from a different perspective and compare them. Are we that weak as Christians that we’re just going to allow a textbook standard keep us from seeking the truth? Fuck that. Quit complaining and teach your kids how to think.

So then I go on and start reading comments that people have left on the blog (the way this works is the articles really turn out to be more like thread topics that are used to spark discussion). Here are some savoury bits from the first comment:

"Maybe Christians should seriously consider the whole idea of sending children off to college in the first place…I learned more in the first 4-6 months at my new job, then I did in almost 5 years of college. I believe Christian business men should bring back apprenticeships/internships to train up the next generation." -Brandon-

Okay, I guess that applies to a certain, very limited, bracket of fields, especially since licensing laws often times require study at a votech or better, but I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and let you have that small bracket. Still not a valid reason that “Christians should seriously consider the whole idea of sending children off to college.”

The next comment:

"I agree with Brandon. My university years were wasted years that didn't get me any farther than I would have been just entering the work force and working. Of course there are some professions where it is unavoidable (doctor, lawyer, etc), but for those getting general degrees, it is just as advantageous to use an apprenticeship, as Brandon said."

Okay, people, you’re really missing the point of college, and the reason that almost every field requires schooling in order to pass a certain plateau now-a-days. College isn’t necessarily about being trained in practical knowledge for a specific field, but being trained in how to think and process information. If you feel like you didn’t get anything out of going to college, that means that you wasted your time there, not that the system is problematic. You should have taken responsibility for your education and sought to enrich yourselves…and should still be doing so to this day. Again say I: study to show thyself approved.

The next comment is the one that really sets me off. Any classicist or person who is in Greek with me will sympathize:

"The 8th grade A Beka science book has a section titled 'Science vs Evolution'.

‘Science could have exploded with advances during the age of the Greeks and Romans had it not been for their corrupted view of man and nature. Instead of investigativng nature, they spent their time thinking and talking about it. As long as man refused to see himself as a special creation of God with the ability to know and dominate nature, he would be subject to superstition. Thus, the Greeks and Romans had little motivation to unravel the secrets of the universe. (Page 274)

Not only does this apply to evolutionists, it also sounds like the emergent church."

Wow, this person is actually using this quote as positive support of something. Honestly, my jaw dropped at this. It makes me indignant as hell that this brainwashing is being put into the heads of kids. What complete bullshit: “science could have exploded with advances during the age of the Greeks and Romans had it not been for their corrupted view of man and nature…” What do you think you’re talking about? What do you call comprehensive written language, architecture, politics, philosophy, GEOMETRY (I’m pretty sure that guy Euclid was a Greek, wasn’t he? But he was corrupt and stupid. He didn’t do anything for math.), logic, the Aqueducts, civil engineering and public hygiene (the Romans had plumbing. Dumb luck I guess), roads (don’t we owe our modern design of roads to their innovations?), the trireme, and how about the whole concept of how we organize our modern armies. The assertion made in the first sentence of that quote of the Abkea “textbook” is so unbelievably WRONG that I wish that every state would take measures to not allow them as lawful curricula. Oh, yeah, and the “Greeks and Romans had little motivation to unravel the secrets of the universe.” Totally…those Greeks who sat around and talked all the time were discussing which god was screwing whose wife. They didn’t produce the basis for how we reason and educate today, three millennia later, or how we conceptualize reality, or how we record history. Let me clue you in...there is a reason that Plato's verbiage is so similar to that of the Bible. Whoever wrote this should be arrested for blatant historical heresy. I emailed the quote to Dr. Bruss, my Greek professor and one of the preeminent classicists in the nation to see what he had to say about it. I’ll post it as soon as he replies.

Finally, some sense out of someone:


"Brandon,
Where would that leave Christians who want to be doctors, engineers or scientists? Certainly those are not trades that can be learned by apprenticeship. We should not cede territory to the enemy so easily."


The next one I find funny just because it is such a prototypical Christian self-affirmation of belief:


"I had asked an evolutinist acquaintance several years ago (and at various times thru the years) a question about evolution.

'Through evolution, how did humans acquire morals? Where did they come from?' I understand that 'survival of the fittest' is part of evolution, but that serves to push people away. Having morals means that humans CARE for one another, and their behavior is restrained.

I still haven't received an answer from him to that question. He did say one time 'Well, I suppose you're going to say that morals come from God, right??'
Absolutely!"

Great, so you’ve gotten your friend who probably puts about as much thought into his belief in evolution as you into your creationist ideal into a state of confusion. Talk to anyone who is up to date with science and they’ll have a lot to say about these things called synaptic impulses that are electro-biological signals that flit across your brain containing information and could very well simulate things such as morals and cultural norms with the intent of ordering and processing the information the brain receives from the outside world. Under the auspices of this assumption, morals are nothing more than a perceived limitation on the world placed by humanity’s tendency to order and categorize so that it can better make sense of what’s going on. What do you have to say to that, because it is much closer to the type of response you’ll get from someone who is even marginally informed. I’m no scientist, I just read National Geographic. The type of false-apologetics shown in the comment above is used so often by Christians, and is a product of the teachings of books like Abeka and Bob Jones, which instruct Christians to ask these “unanswerable” questions in order to “disprove” evolution. Dumbasses…if it was that simple do you really think as many people would believe it as do? In the order of saving space I won’t talk about my beliefs on this issue in this post, but I just strongly disagree with what this person has posted.

The next one:


"I'm sure you know that Brandon did not mean fields such as doctors or scientists. For the most part, most things can be learned under apprenticeship. If one wants to be a doctor then let them go to a school that is Christian based such as Patrick Henry College and then move on to someplace that gives medical degrees. I personally don't plan on sending my girls to college. If my son wants to go then that is fine but I will greatly encourage him to learn from home. There is way too much evil out there for young adults to deal with already. Anyone who expects colleges, especially secular, to accept Christian learning is far off base. I have known this for years and I am only in my 30's. The world is not going to make it any easier for Christians, only harder.
Now stop being obtuse and try to understand a brother in Christ." -Mrs. Garcia-


“I personally don’t plan on sending my girls to college.” Wow, nice that they have a choice in the matter. Don’t limit your kids or anything there. I find it really ironic that someone who obviously believes that the biblical role of women is to be homemakers and nothing else, and that kids should just go to Christian colleges is calling someone else obtuse.

I really am starting to like this guy (the same one who responded to Brandon initially):


"Mrs. Garcia,
Let me remind you what Brandon wrote:
'Maybe Christians should seriously consider the whole idea of sending children off to college in the first place.'
Seems like a pretty sweeping statement, so I wanted to make sure he wasn't suggesting that Christians shouldn't become doctors, scientists or engineers.
I know about Patrick Henry College, since I live about 20 miles from there. I'm not sure their curriculum and fields of study are conducive to placing their graduates in medical school. It appears most of their students are groomed for staff positions in the Bush administration, not that there's anything wrong with that.
What if your daughter decides on her own that she wants to attend (and pay for) college? What if she wants to go to PHC? Would you try to stop her?
I'm trying to be as acute as possible and I am trying to understand a brother in Christ. My point is that, as Christians, we shouldn't retreat to our little conclaves but should instead engage the academic culture. After all, it was ours to begin with."


Haha, that guy has balls, calling out GWB on a fundamentalist Christian website.

Next:

"What's so ironic is that those schooled in Creationism or Intelligent Design probably have a better understanding of the THEORY of evolution that probably 99% of Americans."


Yeah, I’m totally buying that after the other post. Next, another blurb from the only thinking person of the bunch:

"'The anti-Christian education system is turning America into an anti-Christian nation.' You're ascribing a lot of influence to an institution that doesn't see our kids until age 5 and has them in school 6 hours a day for 180 days a year, with summers off. Who's influencing the children the rest of the time? Ideally, their parents, families, friends, churches and neighbors are. I don't think you can put all the blame for Christianity's decline on the public schools.
Don't get me wrong, our schools are a mess in a lot of ways, but if your statistics are accurate (may I ask for a source?), I don't think it's all the schools' fault."


Right on man. Next:

"For those adults with kids who are in the faith and are getting near the age of attending a University, I have a few things to say. I myself am a college student and I have dealt with secular viewpoints from both my peers and a few of my teachers.
1. For those of you with kids who are very strong in the faith and desire to attend college, PLEASE SEND THEM!! We need more Christians on our secular and many times even Christian campuses! If they are truly in Christ, the world will not be able to overthrow their faith. There are many lost people in college who need to hear the gospel. Give them apologetics material (McDowell's NETDAV) to help them along and encourage them in the faith.
2. For those of you who are parents to kids who are very weak in the faith or lost, to you guys I would say to consider a Conservative Christian college (be sure to check to make sure because there are secularists and liberals who are teachers at Christian colleges whose goal is to overthrow people's faith).
Ultimately, it's up to you and your students where to go. Please consider wisely."


Right. I’m buying that one after having entered the Christian Education Machine as an agnostic in high school. I’ll tell you what being in that environment did for me. Made me pissed, and gave me yet more fuel and ammunition against the Beast of corporate Christianity. Yeah parents, if you’ve got a kid who doesn’t believe what you believe, instead of letting him go someplace where he’ll be able to freely seek truth from among the lies, and develop his own views on his walk of faith, force him into some close-minded place where he’ll be either miserable or become a clone of all those other spineless Christian people out there…
Why are we so afraid to let our people THINK? My parents gave me the freedom to explore whatever I was led to when I didn’t follow what they believed, and just had faith that because I was searching for the truth, that I would find it. I believe that I did find it, and it is my own personal faith, not something created for me by the Southern Baptist Convention, or the SDA, or the Evangelicals. I believe what I believe because I have wrestled with it, and I intend to give my kids the same freedom of discovery that was afforded me. We are so insecure in what we believe as the truth. And I’m getting really pissed and tired of it.

My conclusion: These people are brainwashed misogynists who don’t know history. Don’t listen to them, and please, please don’t let them have any say in the educational system. I’m living proof that not all homeschoolers are like them…

Sorry about the length here, but I feel like this is really important to post. Blessings to all who seek the truth and the Light.

-Spencer-